The (formerly) Magic Roundabout

The new film version of The Magic Roundabout received its premiere in London this afternoon. It looks worse than I imagined. I know I’m too precious about ‘old school’ kids TV, I know it’s not entirely becoming in a man my age, but I cannot let this lie.

Firstly it’s all CG. In how many ways is that wrong? Just because you can do something in a new fangled hi-tech way, doesn’t mean you should. CG animation has no charm, no subtlety and no character. Everyone looks like a shiny android. It looks cheap. It looks nasty. I hate it. (Can I add that I'm not anti CG at all. Toy Story, Shrek, Antz - all great films.)

There is some good casting. Ian McKellen is Zebedee, Jim Broadbent voices Brian the snail and Bill Nighy is Dylan. But please, give me 5 minutes alone with idiot who decided Robbie Williams should be Dougal. I’ll not give the talentless, northern git the oxygen of anymore publicity on this site, but my displeasure is, I hope, noted. And speaking of talentless, Kylie Minogue as Florence? Want to appeal to the under 10’s do we? You should be so lucky. .
Incidentally, I’ve just seen footage of the premiere on Sky News, and Kylie for the love of god lay off the botox will you sweetie! You’re not 15 years old anymore. We know that. You’re 36 and it’s nothing to be ashamed of – I’m 37 and through a mixture of clean living and going to bed early I don’t look a day over 34. That and the painting in the attic.

Obviously, I wasn’t invited to the premiere so I haven’t seen the film yet, and yes, it is a bit naughty to be judging it already, but it does look crap. Listen carefully and you can hear Serge Danot spinning in his grave. (He is dead isn’t he?) If you want to watch The Magic Roundabout pop off down HMV tomorrow and buy the BBC video of Eric Thompson’s charming TV series. Or get Dougal & The Blue Cat, Danot’s own film. I own them both. They’re lovely. They’re enthralling. They’re The Magic Roundabout.

Beware of imitations.