You bunch of sheep

People of Britain. I've had cause to moan at you collectively in the past, so please excuse me while I do it again. The trouble is you see, I have a natural instinct to always see the best in people; I always try to give the benefit of doubt where possible, to see the other side of the coin so to speak, but you constantly let me down with your endless stupidity. Your response to the threatened fuel protests in the second half of this week is a case in point.

An unelected, unaccountable bunch of rabble rousers known as the 'Fuel Lobby' are planning action from Wednesday to Friday. They have made it clear that there will be no blockades of refineries as there was in 2000 and so there will not be any shortage of fuel. Hurrah. But what are you lot doing en masse? Why, panic buying of course! Buying a weeks worth of petrol in a day. Creating traffic jams which stop sensible, level headed people like myself getting home from work in a timely fashion.

You really are a bunch of mindless fucking automatons aren't you? Not one of you is capable of achieving the level of thought being shown by the cauliflower cheese I'm tucking into as I write. Look - it's simple, no panic - plenty of fuel for us all and no traffic jams. Panic - chaos leading to bad tempers and frayed nerves.

Let's look a little deeper. What is the point of the protests? To complain about the high level of taxation on our petrol and the profits which oil companies are making at our expense. Completely reasonable. Considering that we produce (from the North Sea) the majority of the oil we consume, the price of petrol in this country is an outrage. But, by buying a weeks worth of petrol in one day you have given the oil companies a weeks worth of profit in one day. Brown has a weeks worth of fuel tax in one day. Do you see where I'm coming from here? You really haven't thought it through have you? Jesus, a child could have worked it out, but you lot with your sheep like, follow the flock instincts have spectacularly failed to get even a basic grasp of the issue. The real question is why is our fuel so expensive when we have been a net exporter of crude oil for the last 30 years (that means we produce more than we consume for the really stupid ones). Where has the money gone? That's what you need to be asking if you'd only get you heads out your arses for a few minutes. The people of Norway are voting on what to do with their oil money, while we're still holding jumble sales for school books.

If you want to hurt the oil companies and the government you need to NOT BUY PETROL AT ALL for a few days. Hit them in their pockets for a change. Turn the tables. At the moment, Mr Chairman of BP is laughing his fucking arse off at you. That's another fat bonus for him as you sit listening to the radio in a four hour queue.

And one more thing. This oil you know, it isn't going to last for ever. If one or two of you with more brain power than my tea want to look up 'peak oil' and start spreading the word then maybe you'll all have something to panic about.

But you won't. You'll keep on following the rest of them, bleating gently as you fill up with overpriced petrol while remaining slaves to BP, Shell etc...

You're idiots.

Look, baaa, it's 98p there, baaa, better fill up baaa