So it goes
As you’ll have realised, I’m struggling to find either the time or the inclination to write much at the moment. I don’t know why, but I’m suffering from a most overwhelming bout of ennui that shows no sign of shifting. It’s not that I have much to worry about, my job again seems secure, I live in a nice place (though I have to move sooner than I was planning), my friends remain a constant source of joy and love, I’m happy being single and certainly don’t have the aptitude to whore my tired body round the tedious cycle of dating and all the ‘getting to know you’ shit that goes with it. But, I sort of feel is this it? As Jack Handey said “I hope the world isn’t a joke, because I don’t get it.” It makes no sense. There’s no reason to it. If I was a blues singer I’d say I’ve lost my mojo.
Another place
I read somewhere, the BBC website I think, that writing a diary is a good way of staying sane and of keeping things in perspective so I’m going to try that for a while. It’s something I did as a younger man. I started when I was about 15 and continued through those angsty teenage years up to my early 20s. I read them back sometimes and they cover some really crucial periods of my life. My O level selections and me waking up to the fact that I couldn’t just drift through life on my ready wit and (then) sharp intellect. I wrote throughout the diagnosis of my father’s cancer and his death 4 years later; I wrote as I joined and left the RAF; of my first love, my first heartbreak, alcoholism, discovering drugs and the two sides of that blurry coin. I’ll write them up into something one day. They’ll be nothing special of course, just one person’s journey through the life we all live. We all have a story to tell about the road which leads to the here and the now.
I’m not going to start it on the Phylotopian just yet though until I feel it has got some substance and some body – when it feels, as it used to, like something I need to do, want to do, not something I ought to do. Years ago I set up a MySpace site, mainly to register Phylos and Phylotopian before anyone else did. It’s been dormant for sometime, but I’ve logged back in and intend to keep it updated. You can find it here. Become a friend if you wish.
The Phylotopian is not going to die though I assure you. It always makes me happy when I look at my stats to see regulars still visiting now and again despite the infrequency of posting. I thank you. There will still be things that piss me off, things that will compel me to write more furious diatribe about the state of the world and the utter incompetence and corruption of those we have charged with ‘leading’ it. I hope to be writing very soon about Bliar’s departure from office and if I’m really lucky I’ll be writing even sooner about his arrest and trial. Thatcher has to die soon surely. That’ll be worth a few posts once the hangover subsides.
Keep the faith.
Another place
I read somewhere, the BBC website I think, that writing a diary is a good way of staying sane and of keeping things in perspective so I’m going to try that for a while. It’s something I did as a younger man. I started when I was about 15 and continued through those angsty teenage years up to my early 20s. I read them back sometimes and they cover some really crucial periods of my life. My O level selections and me waking up to the fact that I couldn’t just drift through life on my ready wit and (then) sharp intellect. I wrote throughout the diagnosis of my father’s cancer and his death 4 years later; I wrote as I joined and left the RAF; of my first love, my first heartbreak, alcoholism, discovering drugs and the two sides of that blurry coin. I’ll write them up into something one day. They’ll be nothing special of course, just one person’s journey through the life we all live. We all have a story to tell about the road which leads to the here and the now.
I’m not going to start it on the Phylotopian just yet though until I feel it has got some substance and some body – when it feels, as it used to, like something I need to do, want to do, not something I ought to do. Years ago I set up a MySpace site, mainly to register Phylos and Phylotopian before anyone else did. It’s been dormant for sometime, but I’ve logged back in and intend to keep it updated. You can find it here. Become a friend if you wish.
The Phylotopian is not going to die though I assure you. It always makes me happy when I look at my stats to see regulars still visiting now and again despite the infrequency of posting. I thank you. There will still be things that piss me off, things that will compel me to write more furious diatribe about the state of the world and the utter incompetence and corruption of those we have charged with ‘leading’ it. I hope to be writing very soon about Bliar’s departure from office and if I’m really lucky I’ll be writing even sooner about his arrest and trial. Thatcher has to die soon surely. That’ll be worth a few posts once the hangover subsides.
Keep the faith.
posted by phylos @ 19:45
