Future first

You know what, there's a good part of me that welcomes the return of Tomorrow's World onto the BBC, albeit in a minor way. It has fond memories for me as a bright eyed, wet-behind-the-ears schoolboy wondering what his future would behold. Thursdays were always kinda special anyway. Last evening before Friday, shepherd's pie for tea, Top of the Pops, Tomo's World, Kenny Everett and bed. Wasn't it simple then? But the more I think about it, the more I feel I should be withholding my license fee in protest at the false dreams sold me by Raymond Baxter, Judith Hann, Michael Rodd et al.

The problem with technology shows is that they always glamorise what they believe will happen. So we were told that computers would take away the vast majority of the tedious, mundane crap which makes up the majority of our working days, freeing us to be creative, playful, to enjoy the beauty around us. We were told that we would only need to go to work for 90 minutes or so each week to make sure the computers were doing everything well. We were told that we would go to work in hover cars. These would be miniature flying saucers powered by water and fitted with all sorts of devices that would end accidents and congestion. Oh the joy. In 1974 the biggest problem envisaged for the future was 'what on earth would we do with all our leisure time?'

But it hasn't happened has it? The opposite has. We're now tied to our sodding computers like slaves tied to the oars of a Greek Trireme. One company's computer will not speak to another's, so data has to be emailed, printed out onto paper and manually re-entered. Then checked. Then corrected. It's bollocks. A computer could do it. Oh, hang on...

So Tomorrow's World you can go to hell. With Tops of the Pops. And Fearne Cotton hopefully.